For those of you that are inquiring as to what my post will be for today, I will come right out and tell you it's a rant. A big, huge, freaking RANT!! If you don't feel in the mood to read a rant, then please, by all means, navigate away from this page. However if you would like to take part in my little outburst, then read on my friends, read on.....

Ok, so many of you know that Tom (my husband) has been quite ill for a long time. About 3 years to be exact, and the more tests we've done have proven futile in assisting us in finding the cause of said illness. We have been frustrated and hopeful, and let down many times over, and am pretty much at the end of our ropes, until Tuesday we really had no hope of figuring out what the root of this was, and then we heard the voice of a sweet, kind, yet somewhat urgent woman on the phone who advised us to come into the office right away because they had found something in Tom's blood work. Little did we know what was to be awaiting us as we walked into the foreboading maze of an office the next day....(da da da dum!)
First I must explain that the 24 hours between the nurse's call and the actual appointment was less then pleasant. I was somewhat relieved that they had finally found something to go on and we could begin to deal with it, however, if you know my husband at all, you know that he will automatically jump to the worse possible scenario and multiply it by 10 and figure that has to be the enevitable outcome. So by the time he told me about the phone call, he was absolutely certain that he had cancer and we were going to have to take out a second mortgage on the house, and the he would pretty much be dead with in the next year. I, at this point, was determined not to follow him down THAT road, and stated we should just wait for the appointment and all would be revealed in due time.

HA!! HA!! Boy was I wrong! Let me set the scene for you....Tom and I walk into the doctor's office and after checking in, we sit down and wait with baited breath for our turn behind the protection of the closed door with the all-knowing medical yoda who would reveal our fate. I look around and noticed others waiting with us. One man looked particularily nervous and gittery, my conclusion....prostate exam....no man can wait patiently and calmly when faced with that.
Anyway, we wait......and wait.....and wait. 45 minutes later, a doctor, not Tom's doctor, calls "Thomas Hossie" and we practically jump out of our seats and take 3 deep breaths to calm our nerves due to the unknown circumstances that await us. I give a sympathetic smile to prostate exam man (poor guy), and continue on my way. My husband and I are led behind private closed door and are asked to sit. THe doctor turns to us and asks "So what are you here for today?" In my head, I'm thinking "Is he kidding? Should I laugh? Was that a joke? Surely he wouldn't jest in a time like this....Maybe he wasn't filled in?" So I let him know that we were told to come in due to some findings in my husband's blood work. He then says "Ah, uh huh..." and takes a look in the mystery file containing my husband's records, records of what we aren't sure, but records nonetheless. The man in the white coat then turns to us and says "Well it looks like his last blood test showed that his hemaglobin levels had dropped somewhat." I'm on the edge of my seat waiting for him to finish the sentence, then it finally dawned on me...that WAS the end of the sentence! That's it? Really? Seriously? I then informed the doctor that this was actually quite normal for Tom's blood work, so there must be something else, and asked if he could possibly check again. The doctor then proceeded to ignore me and take Tom's blood pressure. Excuse me!!! DO NOT just ignore me, I did speak, right? I mean, I vocalized what was in my head (with some necessary censoring of course)...did no one hear me? Then as the machine was taking Tom's blood pressure, the doctor left! Go to happy place Tennille, go to happy place. 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5....AH! Is this a joke? Am I on camera somewhere? Are we being punked?
When the doctor returned he asked if it was finished and we nodded our heads stunned that this guy is actually for real. So once he comes back in the office, he sits down and asks Tom if he has any health conditions or problems....At this point I was ready to blow up. Picture me glaring so hard that I'm imagining the doctor's head exploding. Any health problems??????? "No doctor, I've just been feeling a little under the weather....for the last 3 YEARS!
Anyway, the the doctor looks at the mystery file again, and states "Oh, actually since the last blood test your hemaglobin levels have actually gone up." Oh that's it. I'm done. Ok Doc, well thanxs for, well, nothing really, but have a good day anyway, and hope you help someone else today to make up for this round. Ciao! Of course this was all in my head, and we just stood up, stunned, and walked out of the office without anything else. THen I proceeded to go on a rant for about half an hour on how pathetic and useless that was. Needless to say, we are now shopping for a different doctor, and competency is a high priority at this point!

Yes, if want to avoid a rant, don't ask me about this particular experience, ok? SERIOUSLY!!!

Song of the Day: History is Made By Stupid People - By Arrogant Worms

posted by Tennille @ 2:17 PM 7 comments

Saturday, November 11, 2006

"THERE ARE NO GOOD DAYS OR BAD DAYS...ONLY DAYS OF GRACE."

Song of the day : Solid Rock - By Delirious.

posted by Tennille @ 11:13 AM 4 comments

In My Head and in My Heart.....

Thursday, November 09, 2006

Song of the Day......

Our God Reigns

40 million babies lost to Gods great orphanage,

It’s a modern day genocide and a modern day disgrace

If this is a human right then why aren’t we free?

The only freedom we have is in a man nailed to a tree.

100 million faces, staring at the sky,

Wondering if this HIV will ever pass us by.

The devil stole the rain and hope trickles down the plug,

But still my Chinese take away could pay for someone’s drugs.

Our God reigns, Our God reigns,Forever your kingdom reigns.

The west has found a gun and it’s loaded with ‘unsure’

Nip and tuck if you have the bucks in a race to find a cure.

Psalm one hundred and thirty nine is the conscience to our selfish crime,

God didn’t screw up when he made you,

He’s a father who loves to parade you.

Yes he reigns, yes you reign, yes you reign,

For there is only one true God,

But we’ve lost the reins on this world,

Forgive us all, forgive us please,

As we fight for this broken world on our knees.

~By Delirious~

posted by Tennille @ 6:33 AM 3 comments

Morbid Humor?

Thursday, November 02, 2006

Ok, so the picture really has nothing to do with my post, but I adore it, so there ya go.

My blog has become a place of confession for me as of late, and I find this quite amusing b/c things that I wouldn't usually say, or talk too much about b/c I may get embarassed or feel is too insignificant to voice, I frequently decide to, instead, post it on the world wide web for all to see, AND comment on. Ha, ironic. Although I also do find it a release, a chance to vent, get my thoughts and frustrations out, and sometimes get feed back on it too. Not only that, but I get to practice my writing skills, you know, along with my computer hacking skills, cage-fighting/bowstaff skills, and cake building skills.....:o)

For quite a while now, I've made a habit of making "You know your......When....." lists. Mostly for different times in my life, or when I've been really frustrated with a situation, or even just to force myself to see the humor in everyday life. Today, I'd like to contribute my thoughts on one particular cycle in life, primarily in the lives of women....

You Know Your PMS-ing When....

1. The urgency for something, anything related to chocolate is absolutely necessary, and you are willing to make everyone's life miserable until you aquire the milk chocolatey goodness.

2. The little old lady taking FOREVER to cross the street, on any other day, would have been sweet, now, all of a sudden deserves to become your next hood ornament.

3. Everyone around you has the audacity to be breathing so freaking loud!

4. (This may only apply to some) All of a sudden at 3:00 in the morning, your whole house NEEDS to been cleaned immediately.

5. All the freaks on the road don't know how to manage their vehicles around other drivers, and so should just pull over and let you go already.

6. You sit on your couch, surrounded by all the necessary junkfood, sugary beverages, and wadded up snot rags, with tears streaming down your face due to the latest hallmark commercial.

7. Your loving husband tries desparately to console you and make you feel better, however he's just irritating you to no end, and you yell at him to leave you alone, and give you some space, so he does. Then you become upset and angry b/c he isn't paying attention to you and doesn't seem to care that you are in pain, and upset, and he seems to be hiding from you....

So there is my list, I'm trying to see the humor in the fact that once a month our hormones need to swing all over the map turning us into inconsolable, unpredictable, emotional wrecks. Does anyone see the fairness in that? Although I have seen my share of men who seem to have their own brand of man-pms.

Anyway, I have discovered a new board game (well it's not necessarily new, it's just new to me) called "Scene It?" It's a lot of fun for movie/pop-culture buffs such as myself, and a few others I could name...(you know who you are). It would definately be a great game in a huge group of people. Therefore, I definately recommend it.

SO that's all for now folks. Oh by the way, I've decided that's what I want on my tombstone "That's all folks". Why am I thinking about my death? Who knows, I guess I like to find the humor not only in life, but in death as well.

Song of the day: Absence of Fear - By Jewel (yes, I'm admitting it, I'm a Jewel fan, i love her music, and her writing, and I'm not afraid to say it...)

posted by Tennille @ 7:39 PM 5 comments

About Me

Name: Tennille
Home: Kamloops, B.C, Canada
About Me: I pretty much prefer to let people draw their own conclusions...
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